My Flower Garden

I think I can do something other than plant flowers now. I have almost finished the last of the planting, adding a few new varieties to see how they will do. I lost some of my big vines that went over my arbor and I feel like I've lost one of my dear friends. Last year I experimented with Scarlett Bean that you grow from a seed. They grew really tall and had beautiful oranges flowers on them. So I have planted them everywhere this year. So if you come to visit you'll know my house cause it is the orange one. This is one of my favorite times of the year, to plant and then to watch things grow. To take care of them, to see which ones have troubles getting going...those you have to help a little more along til they burst into their full bloom. Some plants just take off and do fine without any encouragement except a little water. But they all need a little fertilizer now and then to keep them going. I have a vine that is crawling all over areas it shouldn't be climbing on. I am going to have to help that vine to grow over the fence instead of onto of the roses. Sometimes I go out into my upper garden and get hit in the face with climbing roses...they need to be cut back, just a little and then they will flourish. Maybe I like gardening so much, because I like to plant things, see them grow. Sometimes they surprise me by being a different color than I had expected, but that color is usually more beautiful than the one I picked out. Gardens are like raising children..you plant seeds, you care for them, you watch them grow, you help the ones that are having trouble, and take pleasure when that troubled flower gets going. The one difference with raising children and growing a garden is that next spring you get a new start and you can change the things you did wrong and start over again, hopefully a wiser, better gardner.

ONLY A MOTHER'S LOVE

I was asked to give a talk in church last fall on gratitude..I had the talk all written when I found a notebook that had been mom's. I had never looked at it, I opened it and started reading and got a wonderful surprise..It was a lot of her Relief Society lessons with thoughts and scriptural references. I read it all day and loved reading about her thoughts on testimony, love, kindness,unselfishness and so on. It was like being taught all over again by mom and realizing what a good example she was and still is to us all. I used quite a bit of her words in my talk and then thought a little more about how I have felt this year. This is a little of what I spoke about. "This has probably been one of the most awful years of my life..but I have to say that I have never been blessed as much as I have been this year..I have been keeping a journal of how I feel through this whole process. There have been many sacred experiences, and since you are all involved I want to share a few of these with you. We all have angels looking after us. They heal us, touch us, comfort us with invisible warm hands...I ask myself what will bring their help? And my answer is; asking and then giving thanks. In Hebrews, we read "be not forgetful to entertain strangers; for thereby some have entertained angels unaware." There are so many people that have touched me during this last year it would take forever to name you all, but one experience I am taking from my journal, written just after a hospital stay last summer. Ever since my parents died, I've always wondered if I would get a feeling of their presence...I would look for it in the Temple and in reading their journals...but just never got the feeling that they were near. I found out differently. When I was in the hospital and feeling so sick, I was lucky, or was it God's design to assign me a nurse named Sarah? She was younger than me. She cared for me in such a sweet loving way for four of the longest days of my life. On about the third night I woke up and it hit me like a ton of bricks that my mom had been there all along...for years. I realized that Sarah's kindness and love was only the kind of love a mother could give. Totally selfless, calm, taking care of any needs and almost anticipating when I wouldn't feel good and take preventive measures. I told Sarah about finally feeling my mom's spirit though her, and then I realized that even though Sarah was a "stranger"...she was the one that brought that spirit with her. There is more to this story, but to keep it short, I will just say that she opened my eyes and I realized that mom's never leave their children, even when we are grown up. Mom had been there all along..and all of you were my angels, loving only as a mother would love her child. As I continued going over my journal I was reminded of all the many things you have done for me. One particular entry says: How many times have I knelt in a prayer of gratitude for friends and family that surround me? I believe that Heavenly Father works through us, we take care of each other. The love that ties us together is a rare thread...it doesn't break. All of you have given of yourselves over and over, just as all mothers do and certainly ours did. A quote in mom's notebook said "The fragrance always stays in the hand that gives the roses." I wish I could send you all dozens of roses. We were blessed to have such a wonderful mom and I am glad that I have felt her presence through all of you sisters, daughters, neices, and friends. I wrote a poem for Mother's Day for our Ward a few years ago and I'll wrap this up with it.

MAMA HAD A DRESSER
FOR HER CHINA AND OLD LACE.
SHE STORED MEMORIES IN THOSE DRAWERS,
AND LOVE WAS IN THAT PLACE.

THE DISHES WITH PINK ROSES,
SPOKE OF SUNDAY AFTERNOONS...
I CAN SMELL HER HOMEMADE ROLLS,
AND HEAR THE CLINK OF SPOONS.

THE DINNERS THERE WERE MORE THAN MEALS,
THERE WERE STORIES OF THE PAST.
THE DISHES AND LACE WERE HER MAMA'S..
THEIR LEGACY WOULD LAST.

THAT OLD DRESSER WAS HANDED DOWN TO ME..
BUT THAT'S NOT ALL THE STORY TOLD.
IT'S THE STORED MEMORIES OF MY MOTHER,
FOREVER, IN MY HEART, I'LL HOLD.

Feeling Good!

This week has been one of the best weeks I've had in a long time.. I've felt so good that I've been working all through my house, so I haven't even turned on the computer. This morning I felt like I was missing my friends and family from my blogging world, so I thought I'd check in. No story to write now, unless you want to hear about my wash and my cupboards and my yard..I'll get back to blogging.. it's just that I hadn't cleaned anything in a long time and it actually felt good..Who would have thought that housework could be fun? (maybe I should change that to satisfying).

Holiday with Jim

Jim and I finally celebrated our birthdays in a new and wonderful way..on a vacation. The last couple of birthday's for Jim (on April 20th) have not been that much fun as he has spent them taking care of old sick wife..well for his birthday this year we packed my whole great big oxygen machine in the car and went all the way to St. George, Ut. It was quite an adventure to go past Provo and just keep on driving..we arrived there on Thursday and had about 2 hours in the sun (felt soooooo good), Then on Friday, Jim went and found some strangers to golf with, so he was happy, Saturday was sunny again and then we came home...sounds very tame and almost boring, but it was very nice to have a change of scene. I have to tell you all that I have found out that I am married to an almost, almost perfect person...(he does have 1 or 2 faults) but he has taken such good care of me these last few years (35 this Friday) he's had to work a little harder the last two..and has come through with flying colors...being patient and helpful and not complaining about having a sick wife. We kind of seemed old on this trip...because Jim really is loosing his hearing and my ears are just plugged from the tubes, so we had to talk really loud and keep repeating things to each other in the car..It seems comical if it wasn't so annoying that you actually do get some of these weird problems as you get older. I love reading all the blogs, because of the contrast, the different places everyone is in their lives...the just marrieds, the new moms, the little bit older moms and the gramas all living similar yet different experiences and we're all tied together and I love that we have the thread running in and around all of us.. It is like one of Abby's beautiful quilts that has many shapes and colors and yet when put together and quilted makes the most warm and wonderful place to wrap up in. I'm glad we have each other..

Why you Never Miss Church

In my neighborhood, we have had some really sad things happen..lots of young people get sick and we've had our share of youngish (50) is young people, die. Even though this is sad, it has also brought us together in such a way, that I feel that my neighbors are apart of my family..my family hears so much about them that they probably feel like that too.. To continue on with this story...about four years ago my friend Eileen's husband who was healthy and well and 60 just dropped dead one night...it was such a shock! Eileen of course was devestated and we all gathered around her to help her through this time. She has been fantastic...after the first year she really got going and has been a great example of getting up and going on with life. The next part of the story goes back to one of my first blogs..about a friend who brought me soup because I was sick..and remember, she had cancer, but was still out doing things for others. Her husband Terry, is a very funny guy, he adored his wife and when she died about a year and a half ago, we all thought Terry would just go down hill. (I personally think Claudia, his wife, made him sign in blood that he wouldn't become a hermit, that he would keep going to church, go to the temple and generally do things that he wouldn't do unless she was there.) He has pulled himself up beautifully...keeping his cute sense of humor, EVEN GOING TO WEDDING RECEPTIONS BY HIMSELF. Getting out...he kept on going...Until recently Jim was SS President and Terry was his assistant and the most important part of their job was racing from the library to see who could get to the bell first..Terry always won, because he practiced more. Anyway..I was told that in Priesthood last Sunday the men heard all this screaming and laughing and yelling coming from the Relief Society room...somebody said "well those women are having way more fun than we are"..at that point Terry snuck out to ring the bell for Sunday School and it was announced that Terry and Eileen were Engaged!!!!! Big Diamond and everything. They had been going out for several months and didn't tell anyone in case things didn't work out. Eileen said, that sometimes when Terry came to get her she ducked in the bottom of the car, so no one would see her. They wanted to keep it a secret, until they knew things would work out. They pulled a fast one on a neighborhood that prides itself on knowing things before they happen..we even know who's going to be the next Bishop before the Stake President does! The interesting thing about these two families is that they have all been friends for 30 years...their kids played together..the husbands were friends, Claudia and Eileen were friends...I learned that good things come after hard things happen and that YOU NEVER MISS CHURCH!

Jo's Birthday

I always loved April 10th...when I was little it was because it meant only 1 more week til my birthday..but as I have gotten older it is just because it is fun to celebrate the month of April and coming of spring with Jolyn. I've shared lots of things with Jo.. a bedroom, a double bed, a bathroom, a mom and dad, sisters and brother,gramas and grampas, aunts and uncles, a love of reading, fun memories growing up on Melodie Ann Way, friends..just lots of happy times. We have also shared each others kids and that has been especially wonderful, because she has taken such good care of mine. It is great to have a little sister who has now joined the "50" club. You are no longer the baby...you are a true real sister with all the rights and responsibilities of 50 year old people. I have no idea what those rights and responsibilities are, but we can make them up as we go. I hope you are having a wonderful, sunny, massaggy, laying around kind of day today over there in Hawaii..take care of yourself and have lots of fun..there will be all sorts of presents and treats waiting for you when you get home! So even more to look forward too! Thanks for sharing your life with me..you are the best and I love you..Happy Birthday to you...love, Polly

Sick Sick Sick!!!!Yuk Yuk Yuk!!!!

I have gotten behind in my blogging due to illness..what else? Last week it was tubes in my ears..I never got them as a child and have always felt so left out, so I decided to go for it. (Kind of like the older women that get braces) I felt this would help my ears look better and I would be able to hear well into my nineties, but I have been totally wronged...Nothing good happened to the looks of my ears and now I can't hear at all! I should have gone for a face lift or boob lift or something..I don't know why I chose ears!!! The next fun thing was the flu..when I get sick it doesn't just go away after 24 hours...so after a couple of days of throwing up all my medicine, off Jim and I went to our favorite holiday retreat...The emergency room!!! It was a beautiful Saturday morning...I remembered that just a year ago on Easter we were there with our friends at Alta View celebrating, so we just had to go again. Jim informed our doctor (Dr. Patrick Sweeney) we know them all by first name basis, that we had one hour, because he (Jim) wanted to go play golf. Patrick (Dr.Sweeney) was very obliging,every few minutes he'd check his clock to see how much time he had left. I got two of those bags of fluid, which in the past have taken a couple of hours, and yet somehow, magically they went through in about 15 minutes..throw in some anti nausea, morphine and we were one our way..Jim got 18 holes in and got to watch the last part of the masters Saturday...so I would say that if I have gotten anything down...it's the hospital thing...it doesn't hurt to write them nice letters...they actually know my name now, and because the disease is so rare, they are all very interested in the case.. so those are my tips on hospital visits...letters and rare diseases, knowing all the nurses and doctors names, stating your mission...(the fact that you only have one hour to get better and get out of there) and then smile and wave as you leave. The admitting lady is named Linda and you can only see her face through a hole, but Jim stuck his head in the hole to tell Linda See ya!!! She brings us the best cookies in the whole world!! Anyway...I hope I will have more time to blog you all and read up...there is one thing that might help us...not quite as amusing as my fun,and something that I would rather you all didn't repeat...that's why I am blogging it to the world...but Nick is having some problems and having to take a month off of work to get some medicine working...It is very hard to watch, and I would appreciate all of you wonderful sisters, neices, friends and loved ones to say a little prayer that we can figure this out and get him up and going like he wants to be. thanks, I love you all...

Baseball Season is on-It must be Jamey's Birthday!

Last night I dreamed I was at a little league baseball game. We were all screaming and yelling for our team. It was such a fun dream..as I woke up I realized it was Jamey's birthday today. Maybe my dream meant that subconciously I was remembering some of the most fun times of our life! Jamey was born on a very snowy day in Logan, Utah. Our first child...I got a little whacked out when I found out I was pregnant (In a good way) I would be earth mother. Practicing my breathing so there would be no anesthesia, I wanted to know what the whole experience would feel like (looking back, I didn't really need to know exactly what the whole thing felt like) but I was young (19) and very excited. I went to Leleche meetings twice a week and turned into the most judgemental of all people..(Young people who haven't experienced anything, but know all) Anyway I thought all people who didn't have natural childbirth and nurse their babies were wicked and evil. I was ready for my child!!! The very first thing I learned from my soon to be child..is that children come when they are ready....pretty much throughout their whole life. Jim and I went to the hospital about 4 times the night of March 21 and got sent home. Then about midnight, I told Jim this was really it and he didn't believe me! We got into a fight, and finally he took me to the hospital. Several hours later (after Jim almost lost his arm because he had to rub my back, poor man) at 7:00 am on this day 34 years ago our first son was born..As anyone that has ever had a baby knows..it is the most wonderful experience I ever had. Just as Jamey was starting to come out...Jim had to be excused to the balcony to throw up or something (I wasn't paying attention). But I heard the doctor say it was a boy and of course there was Jim crying...he had his son. And to make the whole thing even more perfect, from birth Jamey looked exactly like Jim. We discussed several names, but Jim asked me if he could name his first son after him..and I said yes "if we call him Jamey, instead of Jimmy" he went for it. I think that one of the best parts of having a baby is watching your husband just crumble with the joy of it. Now that I have written the story of our part in bringing Jamey into the world, here are a few things about this wonderful child. He was active very young and anxious to get into everything. He loved balls and when he was two he'd watch golf with his dad and try to imitate the swing of the golfers on TV. I think he got the swing down. I remember the first time he got his soccer uniform. He got the littlest uniform, but he was little and the socks came up to his waist and the shirt went down to his feet! He looked great. He grew up loving all sports, but when he got to start little league I think he found his passion. He loved the game, we spent summers every year at Draper Park and then Alta High School watching Jamey excel in this sport. He played outfield sometimes, but his best spots were Shortstop or Second base. He was a great pressure player..by this I mean that if the team was in trouble and Jamey was up to bat, he usually came thru and got the team going again. When Alta won the state championship, we were behind in the second game of the day and the boys were worn out..Jamey was up to bat and I can't remember exactly where he hit it, but it was kind of a catalyst. The team rallied and Alta High School won the State Championship. He learned alot that year, as the coach and captains of the team made sure they were really a team, they really emphasized that and at the end of each game, whether they won or lost, they dropped to their knees and prayed in the middle of the field. That last game, when we all wanted to swarm them we had to wait while they knelt and thanked Heavenly Father. James is very smart, he did well in school, he was smart enough to find Becky after his mission..to pursue her and get married. He started working at ACS about 9 months after they were married and started his career, which in my opioun has been fantastic! He seems to be able to fix problems..kind of like the baseball days..things go wrong and they send Jamey into fix it. He is a quieter boss than Abby, but I am sure just as affective..They've moved him to Philadelphia and back, then to Mexico, then here for a while, then back to Philadelphia...almost got sent to Spain, but instead he commuted to Spain for two years. He's a hard worker(like his dad) He's kind and thoughtful to his mom. He gave Jim and I the best present we ever got and that was 4 of the most beautiful boys in the world, I am crying right now in gratitude for those fun little boys..to watch Jamey play catch and teach them to golf and play basketball. Nothing of the world can touch that joy! Jamey- I am sure that there have been a few moments of misbehavior on your part in your youth, but I can't remember anything except for the fact that you have been a fun and wonderful son and we couldn't be happier that we got to raise you. I love picturing you in your house in PA riding your 4 wheelers with those boys, playing ball, going bowling and just having fun. I love you and wish you a very happy birthday!!! love, mom......ps to show you how time flies, it was 20 years ago that the ward went on that Nauvoo trip..seems like yesterday!

Here comes the Sun

The last few days have been the best days..I find it very interesting that I take 10 pills a day to get me well and on Saturday and Monday I sat out in the sunshine for about an hour each day and felt wonderful!!!! I just sit there and look at the sky and look at the areas of my garden that will need to be worked on and I plan that maybe if I just do a little 15 minute a day cleaning out of these areas I might be able to do it. I had "The Shellseekers" with me...It is like taking an old friend with me to enjoy my yard. I know Penelope would have all kinds of ideas, but I think she has more energy than me.. I still read a little about her life while I am sitting there enjoying mine. Abby once told me that one of my greatest accomplishments was showing my children the art of laying out. It isn't all that easy, she said. There are things to do in preparation and then you always have to be "One with the sun" which means that as the sun moves sometimes if your eyes are closed you don't need it, and then you have to quickly shift your lounge chair so you are in a direct line of the sun. I have planted a few of my favorite flowers on my front porch...rinoculous and pansies at this time of year are gorgeous and even if it snows again, they'll be ok. Then in the middle of May I take those out for the summer planting..I've allready decided that upper garden (with its black furniture) will have all red and white flowers, so when I go up there it will kind of be surprising. When all this is ready, we bloggers will have a lunch out there. It is something to look forward to...

Jim, Nick and I were sitting home last night..just relaxing after a full week. Tyler called and said he was coming over, which was fun to have him for a visit.. Then Abby and Mike called and said they were coming over to give us a little gift they had gotten when they went to Mexico... So we were just visiting and the phone rang. It was Jamey...He said "put me on speaker phone, Taylor has something he wants to tell you" so Taylor got on the phone and said" Guess What!!!There is going to be a new addition to the family....only this time it is Abby who is going to get fat! I think a few babies in this family have been conceived in Mexico...maybe it's the water! Anyway we are thrilled and they are thrilled..I've never seen Mike that animated and of course Jim cried...because he always does..How fun to have a daughter having a baby! I broke all my rules about tending for working mothers and told Abby anytime she needed the help I would be able to tend. (it is the euphoria I'm sure) Anyway, Mike thinks it's a girl and that would be fun to have a girl amidst the noisey, but fun boys. Another note about grandchildren from a proud grama...I was talking to Taylor the other day...He says he loves history..especially people like Leonardo DeVinci, Sir Isaac Newton and Albert Einstein..He loves to read about them and try and figure out how they got so smart and invented things... I am sure Taylor will be a physicist????(hopefully a better speller than grama) or something else equally as wonderful.. He is 10 and sounds old now...not like a little kid.. Can't wait to see them..