Angels Unaware

Conference this year talked alot about service. A few years ago I was sick and the ladies in my neighborhood did and continue to do tons of service! Last year I wrote a little tribute with thoughts from my journal and gave it to them for Christmas. I think I'll share it in a few installments. A few years earlier I had written a little book about the neighborhood using a quilt in it. This refers to that in the beginning.

"Be not forgetful to entertain strangers:
for thereby some have entertained angels unawares."
Hebrew 13:2

"Do you ever wonder where that beautiful quilt ended up? You know the one I wrote about a few years ago? The one that was woven together by the kind people of this ward. It settled about us ever so gently as we sang on Christmas. Well, I got away with that quilt and have been wrapped up in its wonderful warmth ever since. I didn't tell you before, but that quilt has a bit of magic in it. It made me well when I became sick, then again, I really don't think it is magic, but that it was stitched together by angels who have so much love in their hearts, that their very faith and how they act on that faith is what really made me well. Here is the story of those angels and the miracle they performed in my life: For years after my mom died I longed for one of those visits, oh you know the kind where you dream of the loved one and it seems really real and comforting or you feel the spirit in the Temple and you know they are ever so close . I missed my mom. She was my best friend and she was taken from me so quickly. I didn't even have a chance to say goodbye. I wanted to feel her comforting touch or hear that loving voice just once more, but no such luck for me. I guessed my mom had left this world and was just too busy in Heaven and I'd just have to wait to see her again to feel that great love that only a mother can give. I wasn't close enough to the spirit or didn't know my mom as well as I thought. For she would never have left me, not for an instant, without a plan. It took a life threatening illness to open my eyes to the fact that she has always been here. Watching, loving and caring through each one of you. You were all faithful enough to be the angels who took care of me in such a loving way that it felt as if it could only be a mother's love. How grateful am I to you sisters for giving me this great gift.

As I drove around the neighborhood and wandered through my yard this fall, the color of the leaves seemed to jump out at me. Everything seemed more vibrant than I remember. Are the leaves really more colorful? Or am I just more aware this year? I was truly awake for the first time in a long time to the beauty that surrounded me. At this time last year I was slowly getting better from a nightmare of an illness that took three years of my life. Hooking me to machines, medications, doctors, hospitals. Leaving me depressed and wondering if I would ever be the same. As I gaze at the beautiful colors I can reflect on those years with a bit more clarity and I take the time now to "psala" which is an ancient Hebrew word I learned during my illness meaning to "to pause", and tell you, my sisters how you served me and through your love and charity saved me. Many times during the past three years I did not know if I had the energy or the spiritual strength to see me through this trial, and yet because of your very faithfulness time and again I received hope from the women of this ward. Your persistence in wanting to do what is right always comes shining through I would think to myself, I want to be calm like the Barbara's. Or be fearless like Christine, to have faith like Mary...I want to be a light like Kirsten and pray like Sue and Carolyn. I want strength like Eileen. I want to have the countenance of the Savior shine right through my face as it does Imogene's, Laurel's, Diane's,...And so I would try harder to get better, because of you, my beautiful sisters."

more later.